I first met Jennifer Laan during my time at College Park Elementary School. I didn’t really see her that much however until my time at Kingsway College. We never really took the same classes or had the same friend group because I was in band and she was in Aerials, but I saw her in passing and during the aerials shows and I remember thinking that she seemed like a very nice and very driven girl who was committed to whatever she set her mind to.
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Also during my time at Kingsway I went through two relationships and both ended poorly, leading me to believe that there was something wrong with me as a person. During my first year at CUC this all came to a head and even though I had lots of friends and was successful in school I had very bad anxiety and depression. I would worry about everything I said to every person and all the possible ways it could be taken, often resulting in my brain blowing things out of proportion. I was physically ill every morning and had lost a lot of weight, and even though I was on medication from the doctor, I felt something was missing.
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I don’t know what inspired me to contact Jennifer on facebook. I knew she was probably going to go to Andrews and not CUC but I just remember thinking to myself, “She is a loving and beautiful girl and I would love to get to know her better because she seems like she would be a great girlfriend.” So I messaged her and found out she would be working at Camp Frenda that summer as would I. I knew that was my chance, I was determined not to fail this time in starting a successful relationship. Now when you read Jenn’s story about what happened next she will likely use the word “smothering” but I’ve thought about it and I realize the best term for what I did was “stalking”. If you ask anyone in my family, the Perkins family all stalked their women so maybe it was tradition or in my DNA or something. But I stalked her on facebook and tumblr and got to know everything she liked and disliked and brought her iced caps from Tim Hortons when I visited her in the business office at Kingsway and thought to myself “This is going great, maybe there isn’t anything wrong with me after all.” However when Camp started Jenn finally told me that I was smothering her and I was devastated. I once again sank into depression and felt like a total failure. But we talked later that night and decided that we just had to take things a little bit slower. For the rest of the summer we prayed and started to develop our relationship first as friends. We grew closer and I began to realize that I was right, Jennifer is the kind of girl that would be a great girlfriend, and when I found out she was going to CUC instead of Andrews I was ecstatic.
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We formally began our relationship out at CUC and it continued for the next 3 years out there. We had some rough times, mostly because of my overthinking and anxiety, but with God’s help and Jennifer’s patience and love I recovered from my depression and anxiety. Jennifer really has been a blessing from God in my life and as our relationship continued to grow I decided I wanted to marry her. I was down at Loma Linda at the time and told her of my intentions and we prayed that if it was part of God’s will then she would also get into school down here for Physical Therapy. When I found out she did, I began the preparations and after months of searching for the perfect ring I proposed when she visited me during March Break.
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As I look back on all that Jenn and I have been through and reflect on all that God has done for us I just am so excited for our wedding and for what the future has to bring. I thank God everyday for putting her in my life. Her commitment to both school, her family, and our relationship has been inspiring. She really is the most kind, intelligent, and beautiful girl I know and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with her.
I don’t think I can pinpoint an exact moment in where I first met Joshua Perkins. I have known him (At least knew who he was) since grade five, when I moved from my rural town of Ayr to the city of Oshawa. I remember him as the cute, nerdy kid with long curly hair and glasses. But, other then the quick hello in the hall or interactions forced upon us in school, I never got to truly know him.
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Fast-forward to high school, where once again we had little interaction. We shared different interests in our extracurricular’s, so we rarely intermingled. Despite this, I was unaware that God had big plans that involved Josh coming into my life after high school. Near the end of my senior year I received a Facebook message from Josh. He was asking if I was going to be working at camp that summer, which I replied, most enthusiastically, that I was. From that day on we continued to chat on Facebook almost everyday. For me I thought nothing of it at first. But as the messages progressed I noticed that the way he messaged me, wasn’t the way you would message “just a friend.” Josh at this time was just home from university and would visit me at the business office, sit with me at church, and even took me bowling once. But all through out I still wasn’t sure if I liked him in the way that he most obviously liked me.
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As camp quickly approached I contemplated how I wanted this relationship to go, and through the first week of camp, I came to the conclusion that I wanted to just be friends. Josh was smothering me and I didn’t like the way it felt. So on the Friday night, at the end of that first week, I took Josh aside and told him how I felt. I could see how crushed he looked as I expressed my feelings. An hour later as I showered I didn’t feel relief, and I remember a thought coming into my head telling me to talk to him again. So once I was finished I messaged Josh and sat down with him, only to realize that he was crying! I felt horrible! But as we talked, I learned of what a tough year he had and that all he really wanted was a friend. At this point I told him that I would love to be his friend and then we prayed.
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After that night something changed in Josh. I saw a completely new, and wonderful person. Because Josh was trying so hard to win my affections for him before, it masked who he really was. As the summer progressed our friendship continued to deepen and I found myself falling for Joshua. The real Joshua☺ Once camp was over I remember that I had to leave earlier to go to CUC (now Burman) for freshman orientation, and during that week of separation I never missed “just a friend” so much. I remember that once we were reunited, on September 3, 2012, me and Josh went on a walk around Lake Barnet, and as we sat down to look out across the lake Joshua asked me if I would like to officially be his girlfriend. There was no question in my mind this time, as I most assuredly said yes.
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After that day we journeyed through our undergrad together facing many challenges, exploring, and learning to love one another. The start of our relationship wasn’t easy and there were many things that we had to give to God to help us to grow. But as I look back on those moments today I know that God was teaching us valuable lessons, and that he will continue to do so through out our marriage.
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Once Josh graduated CUC, a year before me, he headed down to Loma Linda, California. We then journeyed into our first year of long-distance, which was hard, but a learning experience in many ways. But even though long distance was difficult, the reward at the end came a few months ago during March break. On March 23, 2016 Josh got down on one knee, in the beautiful Temecula Valley of California, and asked me to share this adventure called life with him.
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Our journey together hasn’t been a smooth sailing or easy road. But that’s what I like about it. I read once that there is always beauty in the struggle if you look for it. God has huge plans for our future and I am so glad that He brought Josh into my life. I cannot think of a more kind, compassionate, intelligent, and handsome man to create a life with. I am so excited to marry my best friend and love on December 29, 2016. As we start our life here in California I know that there will be many more bumps along the way, but I am excited for the plan that God has in store for us and the journey ahead.
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